Astronomy Tower
by AlmondWithUnicornHair
Summary: Harry regularly escapes to the Astronomy Tower whenever he wakes up dreaming of his Potions Master. But one night someone is already there! Will Harry reveal his secrets? Harry's 7th year, AU. HPSS Pre-Snarry. Sequels will have Snarry.
1. Chapter 1

**Astronomy Tower**

Summary: Harry regularly escapes to the Astronomy Tower whenever he wakes up dreaming of his Potions Master. But one night someone is already there! Will Harry reveal his secrets? Takes place during Harry's 7th year. Dumbledore is still alive. Voldemort defeated at the end of 6th year.

Warnings: Pre-Snarry, Snarry, Slash, HPSS, language. Don't like, don't read!

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters nor anything else you recognize. I'm just borrowing the characters for a bit of fun. :D

Italics indicate emphasis in dialogue and the thoughts of a character. Un-italicized words during thoughts indicate emphasis.

**Chapter One: Sanctuary**

Severus couldn't sleep. Again. It wasn't his night to patrol, but perhaps he'll take a stroll anyway. And it wouldn't hurt to find a student or two out past curfew and deduct house points. He wandered through the corridors, empty but for the occasional ghost. Feeling bored and depressed, he found himself drawn to the Astronomy Tower. The crisp night air and the black sky dotted with stars were almost comforting.

Meanwhile, Harry had yet another one of _those_ _dreams_. He laid awake in bed, sick to his stomach with worry, hoping desperately to fall asleep again. To fall asleep without dreams. But after an hour of restlessness, he retrieved his invisibility cloak and headed for the Astronomy Tower. It was already the fourth time this week, but this time he wasn't alone.

Severus heard quiet footsteps approaching and quickly stepped into a dark corner and pulled out his wand, preferring to have the advantage of surprise. As the footsteps drew nearer he pondered how many points he should deduct for not only violating curfew, but also coming up to the Astronomy Tower, forbidden for students outside of class hours. _Hmm,_ _perhaps_ _some_ _detention_ _as_ _well?_ _Yes,_ _I_ _believe_ _so!_

The footsteps, although quiet, seemed so near now, but Severus couldn't see anyone. Then there was a peculiar sight as someone removed an invisibility cloak. _Potter!_

Severus stepped into the moonlight, triumphant. "POTTER! Thought you wouldn't get caught –"

Harry turned his tear-stained face and looked at his professor. "Please sir," he choked. "Please, I know I'm out past curfew and I know I shouldn't be here. You can deduct all the points you want and give me as many detentions as you want, and I won't complain. But I really_really_ need some time alone."

Severus stood still transfixed by Potter's glassy eyes. His heart nearly broke by the look of agony and desperation in them, but Severus quickly hardened his heart, determined to not succumb to such weakness. He pocketed his wand and crossed his arms.

"Yes, Potter, I will deduct points, and yes, you will receive detention. But no, you may not stay here. I will escort you to your common room."

"No, please sir, not there!" Harry pleaded. "I can't bear the chance that someone might wake up. I don't want anyone to see me like this. Please, just let me stay here for awhile. This is the only place that gives me any peace."

"Potter, it's past curfew and it's forbidden," Severus said neutrally, fighting the urge to give in to Harry's pain-filled green eyes. _Harry? No!_ _Potter!_

Harry turned away, stepped towards the edge of the balcony and crumpled to the floor. He sat with his knees bent and wrapped his arms around them. "I know, and I'll accept whatever punishment you deem fit. Just _please_ let me stay here for a little while."

Severus was surprised that Harry Bloody Potter didn't protest punishment. _And_ _at_ _receivin_g _punishment,_ _he_ _usually_ _reacts_ _with_ _resentment,_ _anger,_ _and_ _disrespect_, Severus thought. And he ached at the desperation in Harry's voice. His heart couldn't hold out any longer, but couldn't let Harry—no, Potter! – off easily. His mind struggled not only over the urge to comfort and the need to maintain his walls and mask, but also over his increasing tendency to think of the boy as "Harry" instead of "Potter." _Well,_ _not_ _so_ _much_ _of_ _a_ _boy_ _any_ _more_ _is_ _he?_ _He_ _become_ _of_ _age_ _this_ _past_ _July!_ _And_ _he_ _has_ _already_ _lived_ _through_ _much_ _more_ _than_ _many_ _men_ _do_ _in_ _their_ _whole_ _lives._

"Potter, 50 points will be taken from Gryffindor and you will serve a week of detention. I _will_ escort you to the Gryffindor common room -"

Harry's body tensed and his arms grabbed tighter around his legs.

"—but not for an hour or so," Severus continued. "I was already here in the tower, partaking of the clear sky and night air and I am not ready to abandon it yet. So, you will remain with me until then." _Yes,_ _perfect. It_ _wouldn't_ _do_ _good_ _to_ _appear_ _that_ _I'm_ _doing_ _this_ _for_ _his_ _sake,_ _nor_ _that_ _I_ _give_ _in_ _to_ _tantrums_ _and_ _begging._

Harry looked up at his professor in disbelief, fresh tears rolling down his cheeks. They locked eyes unblinking for what seemed like an eternity.

"Thank you," Harry whispered, gratefully. Harry was truly shocked that Snape, the professor with a nasty reputation, would allow Harry to stay here past curfew in the forbidden tower. But he couldn't decide if he was pleased or irritated that Snape would stay here with him. _Why_ _is_ _he_ _letting_ _me_ _stay?_ _Is_ _it_ _because_ _this_ _is_ _an_ _opportunity_ _to_ _taunt_ _me_ _and_ _make_ _me_ _miserable?_ _Or_ _does_ _he_ _really_ _care_ _that_ _I'm_ _upset? But_ _how_ _can_ _I_ _calm_ _myself_ _with_ him _hovering_ _nearby?_

Severus grunted softly, walked towards the edge of the balcony, a few feet from Harry, and rested his arms on the railing. They remained silent and still for several minutes. Finally Severus couldn't contain himself; he had to break the silence.

"Nightmares?" Severus asked nonchalantly.

"No." Harry replied softly. "Not exactly." He looked at his shoes, determined not to look into Snape's eyes. He remembered Snape's legilimency skills and did not want him to invade his mind. He was too tired and emotional right now to use occulmency.

"Do you still dream of the Dark Lord?"

"Yes, but not like I used to. This summer I dreamt about him, the Final Battle, and well, all the other bad things that have happened over the years… Voldemort attacking me when he wanted the Sorcercer's Stone, Dementers, Voldemort coming back, Cedric, Sirius…" Harry's voice broke and he sat in silence for a few moments. "Maybe four or five times a week? But towards the end of summer, about three times a week. And now, once a week, or once every couple weeks." Harry sighed. "I'm very thankful for that."

Severus grunted. "Yes, I'm sure you are." He was truly happy for Harry's sake, but didn't want appear too enthusiastic. He stood quietly for a moment. _So_ _if_ _he's_ _not_ _having_ _nightmares_ _about_ _the_ _Dark_ _Lord, then what?_ _"Not exactly"_ _nightmares?_ _What_ _does_ _that_ _mean?_

"So what's keeping you up at night? Why do you come here? I presume-" Severus gave Har— Potter – a hard look, "-that this is not the first time."

Harry didn't notice the look, keeping his eyes on his shoes. He detected a subtle, very subtle, note of concern in his professor's voice, but found it hard to believe. _Does_ _Severus_ _really_ _have_ _a_ _heart?_ _Could_ _Severus_ _actually_ _care_ _for_ _me?_ Harry shook his head to himself. _Snape! Not Severus! He's_ _my_ _professor!_ _He's_ _a_ _git!_ _A_ _cruel_ _heartless _- Harry closed his eyes tight. _No_, _he_ does _have_ _a_ _heart_, _and_ _deep_ _down_ _he's_ _not_ _cruel_. _He's_ _suffered_ _a_ _lot_ _and_ _he's_ _built_ _up_ _a_ _wall_ _so_ _he_ _can't_ _get_ _hurt_. _I_ know _this_… _But_ _still,_ _I_ _cannot_ _allow_ _myself_ _to_ _think_ _of_ _him_ _as_ _"Severus."_

"Potter?" Severus asked, more gently.

Harry looked up momentarily, his thoughts interrupted. Then looked down just as quickly, relieved that Sev—Snape! – wasn't looking at him. He took a deep breath.

AN: Uh oh! Cliffhanger! Will Harry confide in Severus? Will Harry tell Severus what, or whom, he's dreaming of? How will Severus react?


	2. Chapter 2

**Astronomy Tower**

**LIGHTNSHADOWS** &** cara-tanaka :** Thank you for your reviews! They made my day! **LIGHTNSHADOWS:** Hmmm… Actually, yes, they do have a common "problem", which is revealed in this chapter! **cara-tanaka: **I can't fix the problem with italics, so I changed the format for character's thoughts.

**Summary:** Harry regularly escapes to the Astronomy Tower whenever he wakes up dreaming of his Potions Master. But one night someone is already there! Will Harry reveal his secrets? Takes place during Harry's 7th year. Dumbledore is still alive. Voldemort defeated at the end of 6th year.

**Warnings:** Pre-Snarry, Snarry, Slash, HPSS, language. Don't like, don't read!

**Disclaimer:** I do not own the characters nor anything else you recognize. I'm just borrowing the characters for a bit of fun. :D

Italics indicate emphasis during dialogue and indicate a character's thoughts. Un-italicized words during thoughts indicate emphasis.

**Note:** POV, including thoughts, shifts between characters. I try to make it clear which character the dialogue and thoughts come from. It shifts too often for me to make divided sections, but this is how the story came to me.

**Please** **read** **and** **review!** Thanks! (Constructive criticism welcomed, but please no flames. I'm a new writer!)

**Previously in "Astronomy Tower" Chapter One…**

"So what's keeping you up at night? Why do you come here? I presume-" Severus gave Har— Potter – a hard look, "-that this is not the first time."

Harry didn't notice the look, keeping his eyes on his shoes. He detected a subtle, very subtle, note of concern in his professor's voice, but found it hard to believe. _Does_ _Severus_ _really_ _have_ _a_ _heart?_ _Could_ _Severus_ _actually_ _care_ _for_ _me?_ Harry shook his head to himself. _Snape! Not Severus! He's_ _my_ _professor!_ _He's_ _a_ _git!_ _A_ _cruel_ _heartless _- Harry closed his eyes tight. _No_, _he_ does _have_ _a_ _heart_, _and_ _deep_ _down_ _he's_ _not_ _cruel_. _He's_ _suffered_ _a_ _lot_ _and_ _he's_ _built_ _up_ _a_ _wall_ _so_ _he_ _can't_ _get_ _hurt_. _I_ know _this_… _But_ _still,_ _I_ _cannot_ _allow_ _myself_ _to_ _think_ _of_ _him_ _as_ _"Severus."_

"Potter?" Severus asked, more gently.

Harry looked up momentarily, his thoughts interrupted. Then looked down just as quickly, relieved that Sev—Snape! – wasn't looking at him. He took a deep breath.

**Chapter Two: Questions**

"I **am** having dreams. And when I wake up, I find it hard to go back to sleep." _Safe_ _enough_.

"Nightmares?" Severus asked, knowing that he already asked this and that Harry had answered "no".

"No. They're quite pleasant actually. It's just that when I wake up, I feel upset and I can't go back to sleep."_Have_ _I_ _said_ _too_ _much?_

_Why_ _would_ _pleasant_ _dreams_ _upset_ _him?_ "Why are you upset, Harry?" Severus asked this with so much gentleness and concern that it shocked him. _Damn_ _that_ _Potter_ _for_ _turning_ _me_ _into_ _a_ _softie!_ _And_ _did_ _I_ _slip_ _and_ _call_ _him_ _Harry_ _outloud?_ Severus cursed himself. _I, the_ _head_ _of_ _Slytherin_, _greasy_ _git_ _of_ _the_ _dungeons,_ _cruel_ _potions_ _master,_ _no,_ _I_ _don't_ _have_ _a_ _heart, I_ _don't_ _have_ _a_ _gentle_ _bone_ _in_ _my_ _body!_ _I_ _don't_ _wear_ _my_ _heart_ _on_ _my_ _sleeve!_ _I'm_ _not_ _weak!_ And yet, Severus knows he does have a heart, and he does have feelings. He just doesn't show it. And yet, in spite of his need to wear a cold mask, Harry is melting the ice around his heart. He can't bear to stand to see Harry in so much pain and wants desperately to help him.

_Merlin,_ _he_ _sounds_ _like_ _he_ _really_ _cares! I've_ never _heard_ _him_ _sound_ _like_ _that!_ _Does_ _he_ _care?_ _Did_ _he_ _call_ _me_ _Harry?_ _No, I_ _must've_ _imagined_ _that!_ _Can_ _I_ _trust_ _him?_ _Is_ _this_ _an_ _act,_ _or_ _is_ _this_ _the_ real_Severus? _"Because I don't want to have these dreams."

"You said that they're quite pleasant."

_Uh,_ _oh._ "Yes, but…" Harry hesitated. "You wouldn't understand."

"Try me. You might be surprised." Severus was going mad with curiosity, but more than that, he felt the need to help Harry. He was becoming suspicious but couldn't be sure and didn't want to presume until he was fairly certain. _He_ _seems_ _so_ _alone._ _Doesn't_ _he_ _have_ _anyone_ _to_ _talk_ _to?_

"I would just rather not have them." _Oh_ _Merlin,_ _have_ _I_ _said_ _too_ _much?_ _How_ _can_ _I_ _get_ _out_ _of_ _this?_

"What are they about?"

"No, that's too pr- personal." _Great_, _now_ _he's_ _going_ _to_ _be_ _really_ _curious_ _now!_

Severus suppressed a smirk. _Well_ _that's_ _obvious_. "Potter, you're a healthy teenager and becoming a man. There's nothing wrong with having _dreams_. In fact, one might be concerned if you weren't." _Oh_ _Merlin,_ _I_ _can't_ _believe_ _we're_ _talking_ _about_ _this._

"No!" Harry exclaimed, embarrassed. "It's not like that." _What_ _made_ _him_ _think_ _that?_ "It's just…" Harry took a deep breath. "It's-just-kissing-that's-all," Harry said in a rush, so softly Severus almost didn't hear him. _Oh_ _shit_ _shit_ _shit_ _shit... !_ _Now_ _he's_ _going_ _to_ _want_ _to_ _know_ _who!_

"Again, nothing wrong with that. It's part of growing up, and is perfectly normal." Inside his mind he snorted. _Perfectly_ _normal?_ _Normal_ _teenage_ _boys_ _don't_ _dream_ _of_ merely _snogging!_

"But what if it's about someone you shouldn't?" Harry asked, damning himself for voicing it aloud but relieved that so far his professor doesn't seem fazed and even called him "normal"! _Perhaps_ _I_ _can_ _trust_ _him,_ _just_ _not_ _tell_ _him_ _who_ _it_ _is_ _exactly_ _I'm_ _dreaming of?_

Severus's chest tightened. _What_ _could_ _that_ _mean?_ "Once again, normal. You're not special, Potter. Everyone at some point in their life thinks about, dreams about, or fantasizes about someone that they think they shouldn't." His heart ached, because this is _exactly_ what he's been struggling with. "You're not alone, Harry," Severus said even more gently, kicking himself over what a softie he sounded like. _And_ _I_ _slipped_ _again!_ _I_ _called_ _him_ _Harry! Oh_ _Merlin,_ _what_ _if_ _he_ _noticed?_

Harry was quiet. Severus sneaked a peek at Harry. Harry's head was still down, but his body seemed more relaxed.

_He_ _called_ _me_ _Harry_ _again! So_ _I_ _didn't_ _imagine_ _it! His_ _voice_ _sounded_ _so_ _gentle,_ _like_ _he_ _actually_ _cares. Could_ _he? I_ _thought_ _he_ _hated_ _me!_ "Thank you, professor."

"H- If this really bothers you, then I could give you some Dreamless Sleep potion. It will both allow you to sleep through the night as well as prevent you from having any dreams." Severus paused, thankful for catching himself from saying "Harry" yet again. "But I have to warn you, it is very addictive. I will need to monitor your usage and how you are sleeping in order to assure that you are gaining some relief and yet not becoming addicted."

"I really appreciate that, sir."

"How long as this been going on? And how often do you have these dreams?"

"Um- since sometime last year. At first not so often, about once a week? But now it's at least three to four times a week."

Harry shuddered, and although Severus couldn't see Harry's face, he knew that it was etched with pain. _Oh_ _dear_ _boy_, Severus thought, heart aching for Harry. _Why_ _is_ _he_ so _upset?_ _Over_ _kissing?_

"Perhaps all you really need is someone to talk to. How about Granger and Weasley? You're close friends; perhaps it would be helpful to talk with them."

"No," Harry said firmly. "They wouldn't understand."

"Perhaps you don't give your friends enough credit."

"I know my friends professor, and I know how they would react." Harry sighed. "Well… I'm pretty sure of how Hermione would react and what she would say. And I _know_ what Ron would say."

"Harry, they're your friends. While they might not have any solutions, at the very least they could give you comfort, support."

"That's just it, professor. Ron won't support me, I know. He'll be angry with me, he won't understand, and it'll drive a wedge between us." Harry voice started to break. "And Hermione – well… I think she'll try to support me in her own way, but then she'll lecture, and she'll think she's helping me when she's not."

"I'm sorry to hear that, Harry." Severus could no longer deny that he sympathized with Harry, and no longer worried over saying Harry's given name. _Right_ _now_ _he_ _needs comfort_. _He's_ _trusting_ _me_ _enough_ _to_ _share_ _this_ _much,_ _he's in pain, and_ _the_ _last_ _thing_ _I_ _want_ _to_ _do_ _is_ _hurt_ _him_. _But_ _why_ _can't_ _he_ _talk_ _to_ _his_ _friends? He's dreaming of kissing… someone he shouldn't…? Oh!_

AN: Oooo! Did Severus figure it out? Or is he mistaken? You'll find out in Chapter 3, which should get uploaded within a week. Please stay tuned and write a review – thanks!


	3. Chapter 3

**Astronomy** **Tower**

**cara-tanaka,** **Shadow Kitsume67**, & **Nightshade's** **sydneylover150**: Thank you so much for your reviews! Sugar-Quills for you for making me smile! **Nightshade's** **sydneylover150**: Ooo, you will find out very soon! Hee hee, nope, he doesn't figure it out on his own. Actually, he'll only find out what the "problem" is in this story. He won't find out until the sequel _who_ Harry's Dream Man is. Poor Sev! I'm working on the sequel ("Way To A Man's Heart", which takes place in the following summer) along-side this one. Happy Endings, I promise!

**Summary:** Harry regularly escapes to the Astronomy Tower whenever he wakes up dreaming of his Potions Master. But one night someone is already there! Will Harry reveal his secrets? Takes place during Harry's 7th year. Dumbledore is still alive. Voldemort defeated at the end of 6th year.

**Warnings: **Pre-Snarry(attractions felt, not yet revealed), HPSS, language, AU. Don't like, don't read! The sequel to this will be Snarry!

**Disclaimer:** I do not own the characters nor anything else you recognize. I'm just borrowing the characters for a bit of fun. :D

**AN: **Chapter Three is a bit short, but it was the perfect place to make a break between Chapters Three and Four. Chapter Four will be longer and I hope to post within a week! And I'm so excited that I finally figured out how to use italics without the words running into each other. _Italics_ _indicate_ _a_ _character's_ _thoughts._ (If a single word within dialogue is italicized or if a single word within thoughts is not italicized, it indicates emphasis.)

Previously in "Astronomy Tower" Chapter Two…

Severus could no longer deny that he sympathized with Harry, and no longer worried over saying Harry's given name. _Right_ _now_ _he_ _needs_ _comfort._ _He's_ _trusting_ _me_ _enough_ _to_ _share_ _this_ _much,_ _he's_ _in_ _pain,_ _and_ _the_ _last_ _thing_ _I_ _want_ _to_ _do_ _is_ _hurt_ _him._ _But_ _why_ _can't_ _he_ _talk_ _to_ _his_ _friends?!_ _He's_ _dreaming_ _of_ _kissing…_ _someone_ _he_ _shouldn't…?_ _Oh!_

_HPSS_ _HPSS_ _HPSS_

**Chapter** **Three:** **Assumptions **

"I presume the dreams are not about your girlfriend," Severus stated, rather than asked, finally realizing that it was obvious. _Clearly,_ _Harry_ _is_ _having_ _dreams_ _of_ _kissing_ _a_ _girl_ _other_ _than_ _Ginny_ _and_ _that's_ _why_ _he's_ _upset!_

"What?"

" ? Ginny? Aren't you still seeing her?"

"Oh, no. I broke up with her ages ago."

"Oh." _That's_ _funny,_ _so_ who _is_ _he_ _dreaming_ _of_ _and_ _how_ _is_ _it_ _a_ _problem?! _"What happened?"

"I just realized that I wasn't in love with her. And _couldn't_ ever be in love with her."

_That's_ _an_ _odd_ _thing_ _to_ _say,_ Severus thought_._ Keeping his voice even, he replied, "Don't feel bad. You're young. You can't expect your eyes to first land on the girl you're meant to marry. It might take years to find the right girl for you."

Harry couldn't stop himself from laughing. "I seriously doubt that, sir!"

Severus turned and gave Harry a puzzled look and Harry was looking back at him. Harry blushed faintly and looked down.

"Harry, while you are mediocre potions student and have a talent for breaking rules, you're an attractive young man with many fine qualities. Additionally, you're famous, draw attention, and I've no doubt that many young ladies will fling themselves at your feet for years to come. Surely one of them will catch your eye and you'll spend the rest of your life happily ever after."

Harry blushed furiously and was thankful that he was looking down so that Sev- Snape! couldn't see it. _Did_ _he_ _really_ _compliment_ me_?_ _Does_ _he_ _really_ _think_ _of_ _me_ _as_ _"attractive"_ _and_ _with_ _"fine_ _qualities"?!_

"Sir, I hate being famous. I hate attracting attention." Harry took a deep breath. "And I don't exactly want many young ladies flinging themselves at me."

Severus chuckled. "Ok, how about older ladies?"

Harry grinned to himself, surprised and warmed at the sound of his professor's laugh. "No, I don't think so," Harry replied, laughing.

"Well, I'm sure a nice lad or too will be amongst your admirers," Severus tested, looking carefully at Harry with a raised eyebrow.

Harry was still looking down, and his silence spoke volumes. The air became thick with tension.

Severus started to sit down, hesitated, and then decided to go for it. He sat down, about three feet away from his student.

"Harry, I know you were raised by Muggles, so you might not know this, but in the Wizarding world, there's absolutely nothing wrong with homosexuality. It's really not a big deal at all to be gay-"

"What makes you think-" Harry protested, embarrassed.

"I don't think anything. Just making a statement of fact."

Harry sat silent for a moment. "Well, if it's not a big deal, then how come there are no gay students at Hogwarts and how come I haven't seen any gay couples?"

"Harry, I can say with confidence that there _are_ gay students here at Hogwarts, because I know several current students and have known of others over the years, _and_ there are several gay professors here. As for gay couples, there are a number of them in the Wizarding world, and you might have run across a few of them, but were unaware of their relationship. Not all couples hold hands and kiss in public."

Harry was stunned and wondered who the students and professors were. _Really,_ _there_ _are_ _gay_ _wizard_ _couples?!_ _Could_ _I_ _dare_ _hope_ _to_ _meet_ _a_ _wizard_ _I_ _could_ _love_ _and_ _could_ _love_ _me?_ _Oh,_ _like_ _Severus?_ _Will_ _I_ _be_ _doomed_ _to_ _have_ _feelings_ _for_ _men_ _who_ _would_ _never_ _give_ _me_ _a_ _chance?_

Severus knew Harry would want to know but would likely not ask. "In case you are wondering, I cannot tell you the students' names because I have their confidence and it's up to them with whom, when, and if they will share this. As for the professors, I can tell you because while public announcements are not made, we neither lie about it nor hide it. The entire staff has agreed that if a student was struggling with their sexuality, that it could be helpful to the student to know that they are not alone, and who they can talk to about this. They are Prof. Sprout, who by the way has been in a relationship for eight years, Madam Hooch, Prof. Dumbledore… and myself."

Harry's heart seemed to stop and his mouth went dry. He was utterly, utterly shocked. A tidal wave of emotions washed through him. Shock, confusion, relief, hope, happiness, joy, fear… Harry looked at Severus and found he couldn't take his eyes off him. Severus felt Harry's eyes on him and he turned to look at him. He could see the emotions in his eyes but he could not decipher them. They looked at each other silently for a few moments. Severus fought the temptation to use legilimency.

Harry finally broke eye contact and the silence. "How did _you_ figure it out?"

"That's a pretty personal question."

"Yes, I'm sorry. I just thought… I wondered… what's the _normal_ way of figuring this out…?"

"There is no single normal way. It's different for everyone…," Severus spoke, trailing off, debating over whether to answer Harry's question. He sighed, recognizing that there was only one right choice. "I think your mother would want me to tell you…"

_HPSS_ _HPSS_ _HPSS_

AN: Severus is opening up! What's his story? Will Harry open up too? How much will they share with each other?

Please review! Thank you!


	4. Chapter 4

**Astronomy** **Tower**

**To** **my** **lovely** **reviewers** **wonderlandjessi**, **TheSlytherinShadow**, **cara-tanaka**, & **sm1982**: Thank you! **And** **thank** **you** **to** **all** **my** **lovely** **readers!** I am overwhelmed by the support (readership, reviews, favorites, and alerts). Wow! : ) It gave me so many warm fuzzies that I was in a baking mood. Enjoy some freshly baked chocolate cauldrons!

**Summary:** Harry regularly escapes to the Astronomy Tower whenever he wakes up dreaming of his Potions Master. But one night someone is already there! Will Harry reveal his secrets? Takes place during Harry's 7th year. Dumbledore is still alive. Voldemort defeated at the end of 6th year.

**Warnings:** Pre-Snarry(attractions felt, not yet revealed), HPSS, **language** **in** **this** **chapter!**, AU. Don't like, don't read! The sequel to this ("Way To A Man's Heart") will take place during the following summer & will be Snarry! : D

**Disclaimer:** I do not own the characters nor anything else you recognize. I'm just borrowing the characters for a bit of fun. :D

**AN: **Chapter Four is a longer chapter than the others – yay! The rest of the chapters are going to take considerable work so I don't know when the next update will be. Be patient! I want to take the time to do my very best. We're past halfway! I expect there are maybe two or three chapters left, plus an epilogue. And then I'll be ready to start the sequel.

Previously in "Astronomy Tower" Chapter Three…

"…what's the _normal_ way of figuring this out…?"

"There is no single normal way. It's different for everyone…," Severus spoke, trailing off, debating over whether to answer Harry's question. He sighed, recognizing that there was only one right choice. "I think your mother would want me to tell you…"

_HPSS_ _HPSS_ _HPSS_

**Chapter** **Four:** **Confessions**

**WARNING:** **LANGUAGE!**

The potions master looked into the night sky, remembering Lily. "Your mother. She was my best friend. And for a time I thought my love for her was more than friendship. We briefly dated but when we kissed for the first time, it felt like kissing my mom. It felt nice, but somehow I knew that a kiss from a girlfriend should feel different than a kiss from a best friend or mom. It took me awhile to understand what it meant, but I think she knew even then. Most importantly, she was always there for me and I felt safe with her. She did nudge me a bit, but she was very subtle, talking about the boys she thought were cute, and what did I think of them. I think she understood that it would be best if I came to the conclusion on my own. She couldn't have been more supportive of me. She kept talking about the day I would meet a prince of my own and how she wanted to help plan my wedding."

Harry couldn't believe how much Snape, the cold and unforgiving Potions Master, had opened up to him with such a person story. _Gee_, _that_ _was_ _a_ really _personal_ _story_! _And_ _my_ _mom!_ _She_ _was_ _his_ _best_ _friend!_ _I_ _wish_ _I_ _had_ _known._ _I_ _have_ _so_ _many_ _questions_ _now!_ Harry decided right then and there that his professor must genuinely care about showing support and helping him with this. He had no one else to talk to, and it pleased him that they could bond over this.

"It was similar for me! Kissing was nice enough with Cho and Ginny. But then I had a dream of a kiss that was more than just _nice_. My heart, mind, lips, and my whole body were on fire and sparking with electricity! Later I realized I was kissing a man. So the next few times I kissed Ginny, I experimented. I thought about girls, and the kiss was merely nice, but the moment I thought of _him_, I started to feel warm and electric inside. And that's when I knew. I knew for certain. And everything else started making sense… The way I felt in his presence or whenever I thought of him… I never really noticed or understood it until then. Anyway, I broke it off with her soon after that, but I never told her why."

Harry was suddenly very embarrassed that he spoke so much, and in so much detail. He told Snape, _Snape!_, what he couldn't tell his friends. He wondered what his professor would think of him and hoped that he wouldn't enter his mind and figure out who he was dreaming of. His thoughts were interrupted by the silky comforting voice of his professor.

"What you experienced – figuring it out through dreams and fantasies and a comparison to real life – is normal. Many women and men figure it out that way. But it's different for everyone. Sometimes it takes years. Some even get married and have kids before they figure it out. So, in a way, you are lucky to have figured this out so early."

"I don't feel so lucky right now."

"Why do you say that?"

"It's not easy, feeling alone."

"But you are not really alone."

"I know. It just feels that way."

"Perhaps you would feel less alone if you talk to your friends, at least Ron and Hermione. Tell them you're gay. Ron has grown up in the wizarding world and like I said earlier, it really isn't a big deal at all, so I have no doubt that you would their support. Hermione is intelligent, loyal, and has a big heart, so she too should support you."

"I'll think about it."

"I recommend sooner rather than later. The longer you wait, it's possible that they may feel hurt that you didn't trust them enough to tell them sooner."

"I think you're right."

They sat in silence for a bit, both surprised and please by how comfortable that felt. Finally Severus's curiosity got the better of him.

"So… was that all? Is that what you meant by dreaming about someone you shouldn't?"

_Oh,_ _shit_. _He_ _remembered! _"Well, that was part of it."

"And…?"

_Might_ _as_ _well_, _he's_ _been_ _helpful_ _so_ _far_. "Well, sir, aren't there some relationships that are forbidden? Aren't there some people that you really should not have feelings for?" Harry rambled, out of both fear and a desperation to know what his professor would say. "Like, if that someone is older, uh- old enough to be one's parent, or if- if someone is their teacher, or former teacher – or if they're already married, or if they're…" Harry lost steam and began to fidget with his hands nervously. He wanted to give plenty of examples so it wouldn't be obvious, but his mind just went blank!

The heart in Severus's chest seemed to stop, or was it time that stopped? Harry's words hit too close to home. Part of him wanted to celebrate because he was among very few that were male, had ever taught Harry, and old enough to be Harry's parent (but yet not so old to make Severus shudder in disgust. _Oh_ _Merlin,_ _let_ _it_ _not_ _be_ _Dumbledore!_). But the other part of him knew that Harry couldn't possibly have feelings for the greasy git of the dungeons. He knew what students said about him. And he knew how much he angered and hurt Harry over the years. _Who_ _in_ _the_ _world_ _does_ _Harry_ _fancy?_ _Who_ _is_ _he_ _dreaming_ _of?_ _No._ _I_ _don't_ _want_ _to_ _know._ _I_ _don't_ _want_ _to_ _be_ _disappointed_ _and_ _it_ _is_ _inevitable_ _that_ _I_ _will! _

Severus sighed. "Harry, you worry too much. There's nothing wrong with having feelings towards another person, even… under the circumstances that you mentioned... As for having a relationship, obviously it would be unwise and immoral to pursue someone who is already taken."

Severus took a deep breath and forced his voice to remain calm and neutral. "As for age, as long as both are "of age" and thus considered adults in the wizarding world, then there is not a problem. You, Harry, are of age, so there is nothing to prevent you from pursuing and having a relationship with someone older than you, and yes, even if he is old enough to be your father. And yes… even if he is a _former_ teacher." Severus cringed at the last. _Merlin,_ _I_ _don't_ _know_ _what_ _would_ _be_ _worse_ –_ Lupin_ _or_ _Lockhart!_

He paused, willing the tightness in his chest to not affect his voice. "As for student-teacher relationships, if the student is of age, while it is not encouraged, it is not forbidden. There are rules, of course, and there are methods to ensure that the relationship is consensual, not exploitative, doesn't result in favoritism, and so on."

His heart tap danced wildly as a heavy silence descended on them both. He was mad with curiosity, but at the same time, hoped desperately that Harry wouldn't say who it was, because it would be unbearable to know that Harry had feelings for some other man, especially an older one like him and one that has taught Harry. His suspicion that it was Lupin was growing and that was especially unbearable!

Harry's sigh of relief finally broke the silence. "What do you think I should do?" he asked quietly.

_Oh,_ _fuck,_ _he_ _wants_ _me_ _to_ _play_ _matchmaker?_ _What_ _could_ _be_ _more_ _torturous?_ Severus willed his heart and voice to be calm. "Why ask me, you're going to rush off and do what you want anyway, despite the consequ-" He stopped himself as he heard a small gasp from Harry's direction. He realized that his anger and jealousy could hurt Harry and he didn't want that. He took a deep breath and tried again. "Harry, you have a good heart and good intentions, but you are… impulsive… and emotional. I don't mean to sound insulting… It's just that… in relationships… you can't just think about what you want. You have to consider the effect you will have on the other person." _That's_ _better. _

Harry sat quietly for a moment. "You're right, sir. I do tend to be impulsive. I should put more careful thought into what I do before I act. So… really, sir, what would you recommend?"

"Quite honestly? I recommend waiting. Wait until you are out of school…. And… don't worry about having a _relationship_, just start with friendship for awhile and see how it goes…. Take your time. Try to get a feel for… how he might feel for you…. Don't… Just don't scare him by confessing all your feelings and desires out-of-the-blue in an emotional outburst. Being impulsive and emotional might make you come on too strong. So, just try to take it slow and easy. Whatever you do, don't push him." _And_ _if_ _he_ _waits_ _long_ _enough_ _perhaps_ _he'll_ _get_ _over_ _his_ _crush_. _Oh,_ _but_ _then_ _he'll_ _crush_ _on_ _someone_ _new._ _Fine._ _Anyone_ _but_ _that_ _werewolf!_

"Ok. I'll take your advice." Harry mentally snorted. _Yeah_, _that_ _would_ _be_ _me._ _I_ _would_ _be_ _the_ _one_ _to_ _blurt_ _it_ _all_ _out_ _and_ _scare_ _the_ _man_. Harry cringed, thinking about how easily he talked about his dreams and experimental fantasies while kissing Ginny. _Yeah,_ _the_ _dreams_ _and_ _fantasies_ _I_ _was_ _having_ _of_ you_!_ Harry started to feel jealous of Severus' former boyfriends and wondered how many he had. Harry braced himself before asking his next question. "How do you know so much about relationships?"

Severus sat quietly, as though he hadn't heard the question.

_HPSS_ _HPSS_ _HPSS_

AN: Hmmm… What experiences has Severus had? Will he tell Harry?

Please review – many thanks! Feel free to sample the pumpkin pasties I baked. Happy early Thanksgiving!


	5. Chapter 5

**Astronomy** **Tower**

**Cool** – Ch. 4 got more reviews than any other chapter! ** Thank** **you** to my lovely reviewers **cara-tanaka**, **Droomvlucht**, **Sunshine-aki**, **SoulMore –t.y.u.i.t.y.u.i.**, **Reaping-Vampire**, **Bean-04**, & **PixieofDoom13!** Your support and sweet words mean a lot! **And** **thank** **you** to all my lovely readers! I am overwhelmed by the support (readership, reviews, favorites, and alerts). Wow! : )

**Thank** **you** **for** **being** **patient** **for** **Ch.** **5**. I know it's been a long wait but I got swamped with college (I teach) and then my muse was not being cooperative!

**Summary:** Harry regularly escapes to the Astronomy Tower whenever he wakes up dreaming of his Potions Master. But one night someone is already there! Will Harry reveal his secrets? Takes place during Harry's 7th year. Dumbledore is still alive. Voldemort defeated at the end of 6th year.

**Warnings:** Pre-Snarry (attractions felt, not yet revealed), **language,** **&** **mature** **content** (mention of a significant other pressuring for intimacy) **in** **this** **chapter!** AU. Don't like, don't read! The sequel to this ("Way To A Man's Heart") will take place during the following summer & will be Snarry! : D

**Disclaimer:** I do not own the characters nor anything else you recognize. I'm just borrowing the characters for a bit of fun. :D

**Previously** **in** **"Astronomy** **Tower"** **Chapter** **Four…**

"Ok. I'll take your advice." Harry mentally snorted. _Yeah_, _that_ _would_ _be_ _me._ _I_ _would_ _be_ _the_ _one_ _to_ _blurt_ _it_ _all_ _out_ _and_ _scare_ _the_ _man_. Harry cringed, thinking about how easily he talked about his dreams and experimental fantasies while kissing Ginny. _Yeah,_ _the_ _dreams_ _and_ _fantasies_ _I_ _was_ _having_ _of_ you_!_ Harry started to feel jealous of Severus' former boyfriends and wondered how many he had. Harry braced himself before asking his next question. "How do you know so much about relationships?"

Severus sat quietly, as though he hadn't heard the question.

_HPSS_ _HPSS_ _HPSS_

**Chapter** **Five:** **Confidences** **(confidential** **communications) **

"Professor, do you mind me asking? How many relationships have you had? How serious were they? What were they like?"

"That's very personal," Severus said flatly. He was uncomfortable at being asked such a question and he was also still stewing over who Harry's love interest might be.

"I know," Harry said with embarrassment. "But there's a lot I don't know. I don't think my aunt and uncle are good models, I'm a bit shy to talk to Mr. or Mrs. Weasley about this, and I don't know how different a relationship is when it's with men… I just thought… I thought you might help me…"

Severus sighed. _Oh,_ _Lily,_ _the things_ _I_ _do_ _for_ _your_ _son!_ _Why_ _does_ _he_ _have_ _to_ _make_ _this_ _so_ _hard_ _for_ _me?_

"Harry, none of this leaves here, you understand me?" Severus gave Harry a look, not too hard, but just hard enough to let him know he was serious. "I have had few experiences… with relationships… and none of them were especially pleasant. So I can't exactly give you love advice. Perhaps you could say that I have a better idea of what _not _to do, rather than what _to _do… My most recent relationship, if you can call it that, was nine years ago and it only lasted two months. It ended so disastrously and was such a lovely companion to my other failed experiences that I gave up ever finding someone to spend my life with."

Severus swore under his breath as he stood up, returning to the railing. He was torn. Part of him was extremely uncomfortable with talking about experiences so personal. But the other part of him felt it would be helpful to Harry. His heart ached at the thought that some man might do to Harry what had been done to him. The last thing he wanted was for him to be hurt like that. He needed to warn him.

"Harry, I don't want you to get hurt. You have to be careful. Some men appear to be kind, loving, caring, but after you let them in, you discover that it was a lie and in actuality, they are selfish, abusive, and manipulative."

Severus took a deep breath before continuing. What he was about to say he hadn't told anyone. "The last time I was in a relationship, we dated a just a few weeks before he started pressuring me to sleep with him. I wasn't ready. But he was… relentless... He kept saying that if I truly loved him, then I would… He pointed out all the things he did for me and couldn't understand why I would withhold this one thing he asked for… He couldn't understand what the big deal was… He… never gave up… He… I… I eventually broke it off."

After a few moments of silence Harry still hadn't responded. The silence became heavy. Severus turned his head to look at Harry and wished he hadn't. Harry was looking at him with anger and disgust written all over his face. Severus' chest tightened.

Harry stood up with fists clenched, still staring at his professor, struggling to speak. "What? ! W-What's wrong with—

"Me? ! What's wrong with me? !" Severus was hurt and livid.

"NO! What's wrong with _HIM_? How could he possibly do that to you? ! What a bastard!" Harry closed his eyes tight and shook his head in disbelief. He then opened his eyes, green emeralds meeting black diamonds. His entire face was softened into a look of compassion.

Severus was confused, then amazed, and then finally, touched. His chest relaxed and grew warm. His heart tap danced happily as he looked into Harry's angelic face. Then he felt heat on his shoulder and realized that Harry placed his hand there.

"If it were me, Severus, if… if _I_ were your boyfriend, I would tell you how much I love you, how much I desire you. I would verbally express my feelings for you. And I would express my feelings for you physically as well, through kisses, hugs, holding hands, or anything else we _both_ felt comfortable with. Someday our relationship would reach the point where I would feel ready to be intimate with you, and I would hope that you wanted that too. But I would _never_ _ever_ force you, pressure you, manipulate you, or take advantage of you if your inhibitions were weakened by alcohol or something else. I would _never_ do that to you. If you weren't ready, I would tell you that it was ok and that I can wait as long as you needed. _Even_ _years_."

Severus was stunned. It took him awhile to finally find his voice. "You would really say that?" Severus asked quietly. "Would you really… mean that?"

"Of course I would," Harry replied sincerely.

"But what if you… What if you didn't think you could… _wait_? What about when you get… '_frustrated'_?"

"Doesn't matter. If I get 'frustrated' I can take care of that on my own. But I would _never_ force someone who wasn't ready. _Even_ _if it_ _meant_ _years._"

"But wouldn't you get tired of waiting, and be tempted to break up and find someone else?"

"No. If I truly loved him and he truly loved me, I would stay with him."

"Why?"

"Because if you truly love someone, they're worth the wait."

Severus drew in a sharp breath. "I'm impressed. I wish more men were like you… Someday you will make a man very very happy. Any man would be lucky to be fancied by you." _I_ _wish_ _I_ _could_ _be_ _so_ _lucky_.

"_Any _man?" asked Harry. _Even_ _you?, _Harry thought to himself.

"Yes. And if he didn't return the feelings then at the very least he should feel flattered. He should feel lucky. If he doesn't, then he's a fool that doesn't deserve you anyway."

Harry was amused. The idea that Professor Snape could like him seemed unbelievable. And yet, he himself said that any man who doesn't return his feelings or at least feels flattered is a fool. And Snape would never call himself a fool. So that must mean that he himself would at the least feel flattered! But perhaps when he said "any man," he wasn't including himself.

The two men exchanged soft smiles and Harry removed his hand from Snape's shoulder. He was surprised that Snape didn't yell at him or deduct points for touching him and calling him by his first name. He didn't plan on doing either one; he just did it without thinking. They stood with their arms resting on the railing, looking at the stars and enjoying the comfortable silence. They had no way of knowing that they both were thinking about how glad they were that they found each other that night… and that they found they could confide in the other.

Harry still had dozens of questions to ask, but he didn't want to overwhelm the man and he knew at some point he would have to go back to his dorm. So he needed to decide which one he wanted to ask most of all.

_HPSS_ _HPSS_ _HPSS_

AN: Oooo! What is Harry's final question? Does Severus have any questions of his own? How will the night end and what will occur between them as Harry finishes out his 7th year? I expect that there will be one more chapter to finish up what happens in the tower (titled "Promises" hmmm…!) and then there will be a chapter/epilogue about what happens during the rest of the school year. The sequel, titled "The Way To A Man's Heart," will take place in the following summer and will be about Harry's pursuit of Severus. : D

Please feed my soul and my muse by writing a review! : D In return, help yourself to some of my home-made peppermint hot chocolate. It's perfect for a chilly January night.


	6. Chapter 6

**Astronomy** **Tower**

**Bloody** **hell!** – Ch. 5 got more reviews than any other chapter! ** Thank** **you** to my lovely reviewers **okciak123**, **cara-tanaka**, **Daddys** **little** **crazy** **bitch,** **PixieofDoom13,** **Rori** **Potter**, **Sunshine-aki**, **Ahmla93**, **FirePhantom4**, **Reader-anonymous**, & **Jaspre!** Your support and sweet words mean more than words can say! **And** **thank** **you** to all my lovely readers! I am overwhelmed by the support (readership, reviews, favorites, and alerts). Wow! : )

**Thank** **you** **for** **being** **patient** **for** **Ch.** **6**! This chapter concludes what happens on the Tower that night! I hope no one is disappointed. I'm very happy with this chapter. For those anxious for Snarry action, keep in mind that my version of SS in this story has a painful backstory (date rape – SS will reveal more details to HP in the sequel. Poor Sev!) and low self-esteem, so it's Necessary for their relationship to happen slowly. I hope that the sequels will make the wait worth it! In the 3rd story in the series, HP will give SS some much needed "sexual healing" ;)

I am planning on including one final chapter to this one, which will serve as a bridge to the sequel. However, it will probably take a while before I begin those since I want to try to complete the other stories that are currently posted and in-progress before starting up new ones. Visit my profile page to check my progress on my stories.

**Summary:** Harry regularly escapes to the Astronomy Tower whenever he wakes up dreaming of his Potions Master. But one night someone is already there! Will Harry reveal his secrets? Takes place during Harry's 7th year. Dumbledore is still alive. Voldemort defeated at the end of 6th year.

**Warnings:** Pre-Snarry (attractions felt, not yet revealed), mature content, and **language** **in** **this** **chapter!** AU. Don't like, don't read! The sequel to this ("Way To A Man's Heart") will take place during the following summer & will be Snarry! : D

**Disclaimer:** I do not own the characters nor anything else you recognize. I'm just borrowing the characters for a bit of fun. :D

**Previously** **in** **"Astronomy** **Tower"** **Chapter** **Five…**

They had no way of knowing that they both were thinking about how glad they were that they found each other that night… and that they found they could confide in the other.

Harry still had dozens of questions to ask, but he didn't want to overwhelm the man and he knew at some point he would have to go back to his dorm. So he needed to decide which one he wanted to ask most of all.

_HPSS_ _HPSS_ _HPSS_

**Chapter** **Six:** **Promises**

The stars were beautiful and the night air crispy. But then the wind picked up. Harry, clad in just a t-shirt and pajama pants, wished he had a warmer shirt. He tried really hard not to shiver as he was afraid that Snape would then suggest they go back inside. But that's not what he did.

Severus noticed Harry shiver out of the corner of his eye. He longed to surround the young man with his own warmth, to wrap his arms and his robes around him and press his body up against his so that Harry wouldn't be cold. But he couldn't do that. So he did the next best thing. Without fanfare he quickly removed his outer robe and then wrapped it around Harry.

It happened so fast that one second Harry was cold and the next second he was warm, wrapped in the patchouli-scented robes of his professor, wondering how that had happened. He looked up and his green eyes met black. Harry blushed and looked down. "Thank you, sir. You didn't have to do that."

"Well, if a student were to freeze and become sick because he was on the balcony of the Astronomy Tower after curfew with an instructor, there would be questions."

Harry smiled. "Professor, has anyone ever told you how wickedly witty you are? Or do people lack the intelligence to understand your sense of humor?"

Severus looked at Harry from the corner of his eye, raised an eyebrow, and replied "No, although I may need to revise that to a 'yes' if by your questions you are, in fact, making a statement. In which case, yes, for the most part, but apparently you are not among them."

Harry needed a second to figure that out and then he busted a grin at that rare and treasured compliment. "Yes, I was, in fact, making a statement."

"You know that won't earn you points for Gryffindor nor raise your potions grade."

"Well, in that case, could I retract that statement?" Harry teased.

Severus turned his head to look at the young man straight on. He just stared in disbelief. He then shook his head and laughed quietly. "Why haven't I seen this side of you before? You sounded so much like your mother." He looked away, feeling a little unsettled.

"Am I really like my mum?" Harry asked hopefully.

Severus hesitated. "Just then, yes, you sounded just like Lily. But I admit this is really the first time I've noticed a comparison, besides your eyes… I think I didn't allow myself to look for any similarities because I didn't want to find them. I didn't want to miss your mother."

"I'm sorry if I made you sad."

He made a tiny jerk of his head in response, as if irritated by a fly. "There's nothing you need to feel sorry for."

Harry wasn't sure what to do with that. It was usually difficult to read the man's emotions. He's such a complex man. But that's what Harry loved about him. And then, out of the blue, Harry not only knew what question he wanted to ask him, but he also had a brilliant idea.

"Sir…? There's something that bothers me and… I think it would bother my mum too."

"Please, don't bring her into this. Don't presume –"

"Why not? She was my mum. And your best friend–"

"Harry, please…" Severus begged.

Harry suppressed a grin. _Damn,_ _and_ _I_ _thought_ _he_ _had_ _a_ _hot_ _voice._ _It_ _is_ _REALLY_ _hot_ _when_ _he_ _begs!_ _I'll_ _have_ _to_ _remember_ _that_ _next_ _time_ _I_ _wank!_ _Yeah…!_ _Oh,_ _bugger._ _Stay_ _focused!_ _What_ _were_ _we_ _talking_ _about?_ _Oh…_

"Okay, I won't bring her into this. But it _does_ bother _me_… Sir, have you really given up? Completely?"

"Given up on what?" Severus asked drily, although he had a pretty good idea of what.

"On finding love, being in a relationship, having someone to spend your life with," Harry replied wistfully.

Severus sighed. He really had a right mind to say "it's not your business." But it had become harder to hold Harry at such a distance. Besides, he's already shared so much and feels that he can trust him. He couldn't help but to answer the question, and answer it honestly. "Yes, I have."

"You shouldn't give up."

"Harry, it's been years…"

"It doesn't matter how long it's been. Look at me! I've never really had a serious relationship, and certainly not with a bloke. I'm scared! But should I give up without trying?"

"Harry, you'll be fin-" Severus started.

"Don't try to change the subject, Snape," Harry glowered. "We're not talking about me, we're talking about _you_ and why you shouldn't give up."

Severus swallowed and blushed faintly. "Who would want me? I'm not attractive. I'm grumpy. I'm not…" He shrugged uncomfortably.

"You're too hard on yourself. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Some people would say that you _are_ attractive. You are an accomplished master of potions, a very brave and loyal man, and you have other nice qualities as well. Yes, you're grumpy, snarky, and at times appear to be sadistic. But some people don't mind that. Some actually like it."

"Don't think that flattery will give you any points."

"I'm being serious, sir." Harry pouted.

Severus raised an eyebrow and then shook his head at him.

"You don't believe me? I'm being perfectly serious. There _is_ someone out there for you!"

Severus gave a look of exasperation.

"Okay, look… I'm very nervous about pursuing the man I'm interested in. And I'm afraid I'll fuck up –"

"Language, Mr. Potter!" Severus chided, amusement softening his tone and expression.

"Sorry," Harry said. _Not_ _sorry_, he thought. "I'm afraid I'll _mess_ up my chances with him by being my normal impulsive self and spilling my feelings in an emotional outburst. I admit that taking your advice will be a challenge for me. As for you, you said that you've given up on love. Let's make a deal._ I_ promise that I will take your advice – every last bit of it – if _you_ promise to give love a chance. Just be open to the idea that someone might take an interest in you and want to be in a relationship with you and be open to the idea of giving them a chance. Don't be so mean to yourself. Try to be a little more social. Meet new people and spend more time with people you already know. What do you think, is that a deal? !" Harry smiled, proud of himself.

Severus looked at Harry carefully, considered it, hesitated, and then finally nodded his head in agreement. As Harry put out his hand and Severus shook it, he wondered why he agreed to this insane promise, but he couldn't for the life of him figure out why. But since he agreed he wouldn't back down. No, he never backs down from a promise or agreement. So, somehow he'll have to see it through. He cursed himself as he started to fully realize the implications of this.

"Harry, for a proper agreement, we need to declare the terms. For instance, there should be a time limit on this."

"Okay, how about for the remainder of this year, beginning this summer?"

Severus hesitated. _That's_ _not_ _too_ _terribly_ _long._ _I_ _can_ _manage. _"That's agreeable."

_Yes!_ _He_ _agreed!_, Harry thought to himself with a smile. "And if there are any other terms you feel we should have, how about we discuss them when summer begins?"

"That would be fine." _That_ _will_ _give_ _me_ _time_ _to_ _plan_ _out_ _the_ _terms_ _I_ _want_ _included_, Severus thought, satisfied.

Severus's curiosity got the better of him. He knew he shouldn't ask. He knew he would be disappointed. But he just couldn't help it.

"Do you want to tell me who you fancy? Who you have been dreaming of and plan to pursue?"

Harry looked down uncomfortably. "No, I don't. Not tonight anyway. I hope you don't mind."

"That's fine."

"It's not that I don't trust you!" Harry insisted. "It's just… I…"

"Harry, it is fine! Really! It is not my business."

The two men fell silent, each uncomfortable for their own reasons.

Severus was desperate to do something about the uncomfortable silence. "I… wish you luck this summer... Not that you really need it." He tried not to let sadness creep into his voice.

Harry laughed softly. "Thanks. I'll need every bit of luck I can get. I'm more nervous about pursuing him than I was about defeating Voldemort! And he won't be an easy man to pursue."

"You worry too much. You'll be fine."

Harry shook his head. "Will I? It's not going to be easy! I'm afraid of scaring him off, afraid of rejection. And on the slight chance he is open to a relationship with me, what if… What if I can't meet his expectations? He's older than me. I've had very little experience in relationships. What if I disappoint him? And I'll just be fresh out of school whereas he's settled with a career and a life. I... Before tonight, before our conversation, I struggled with my feelings for him. I was going to try to forget about him. But now I have hope. And while that makes me happy, it also scares me because now I have a whole new set of problems! And not to mention my friends and how they'll reaction to who it is I've been fancying."

"Harry, I assure you that you will be fine. Any insecurities that you have are normal. But, if the man you care for _truly_ cares for you, then he will accept you just as you are and he will be willing to work through any issues that the two of you have. And if he doesn't, then he doesn't truly care for you and therefore doesn't deserve you. Never settle for less than that."

Harry nodded and smiled, comforted by the advice from the very man he planned to pursue.

"And the same is true for your friends. If they cannot accept that you have genuine feelings for someone, then they weren't really your friends to begin with, were they?"

"I know. You're right."

"If… you ever have questions or need to talk…" Severus trailed off, feeling conflicted about what he was about to offer.

Harry looked up at the older man in surprise, as if to ask if he really meant it.

Severus merely smiled in response, then looked away shyly. _Why_ _not?_ _If_ _nothing_ _else,_ _perhaps_ _we_ _could_ _become_ _friends._ _That_ _would_ _be_ _nice_, _wouldn't_ _it?_ _Wouldn't_ _it_ _be_ _better_ _than_ _nothing_ _at_ _all_ _between_ _us?_

"Thank you."

Severus looked at Harry to see what appeared to be fondness in his face. He hoped to see that expression directed towards him more in the future. "For what?" he asked.

"Everything." Harry smiled bigger, looking deep into the glittery black eyes. "I can't thank you enough. I was really upset. And…" _Keep_ _it_ _simple_, Harry thought to himself, fighting the urge to gush over every little thing he was grateful to Snape for. "You made everything better," he finished.

Harry spoke few words but looked so intently at Severus that he got the sense that he was holding a lot back. Severus turned away to hide his smile and blush. He wasn't used to receiving words of gratitude, especially ones gushing with emotion. "You're very welcome," he whispered.

"I know it's late. I should go back to bed."

Severus nodded. "Harry… what happened here tonight…"

"Don't worry. What happens on the tower stays on the tower."

Severus looked at the younger man curiously.

"Oh, sorry!" Harry laughed. "That comes from a North American muggle expression. What I mean is, I won't tell anyone what happened or what you shared with me. It stays between us." Harry smiled softly.

Harry retrieved his invisibility cloak and then they walked down the stairway in silence. Harry clutched at the professor's robes around him, savoring its scent of patchouli as long as he would be allowed. Just before they entered the main halls, Harry reluctantly removed the robes and handed them to the older man, who immediately put them on.

"Thank you," he whispered.

Severus gave a small nod, quirking the corner of his lips.

Harry smiled to himself. He was amazed that his professor, so cold and distant, had opened up to him so much, and was amused by how quickly he closed himself off again. It didn't bother him. He had long accepted the man just as he was, even if he didn't always understand him. And now that Harry understood the man a bit more, had a chance to see a glimpse of the _real_ Severus, and was the recipient of his kindness, his love for him grew even greater than it was before.

When they arrived at the Gryffindor Tower entrance, Severus hardened his face. "Don't let me catch you out past curfew again, Mr. Potter, or you will lose points and serve detention."

Harry knew that despite everything that happened between them earlier that Snape was serious. "I understand. And what about for tonight?" He knew that Snape hadn't forgotten, but he hoped that he would go light on him.

Snape's eyes widen ever so slightly. "Detention next Monday, after your last class. There will be cauldrons in need of scrubbing... As for points… fifty points from Gryffindor."

Harry nodded with eyes downcast, trying not to wince.

"And fifty points _to_ Gryffindor. For bravery and kindness."

Harry looked up in surprise. Snape's face was still cold on the outside, but Harry knew it was just a mask. On the inside, he knew Severus was smiling too.

Harry said good night, gave the password to enter the common room, and then climbed the stairs to his dorm. Once snuggled warm in his bed, he let his mind wander over everything that happened that night on the tower. He didn't want to forget a thing. He was so excited about the coming summer. He was filled with so much hope and excitement, he wasn't sure if he could settle down for sleep, but finally sleep he did. And for the first time in a long time he went to sleep with a big smile, not fearing the dreams that may come his way.

Meanwhile, in the Potions Master's quarters, Severus was sad that the night had to end. While it wasn't easy at first to open up to Harry, when it was time to resume his role as the cold and distant professor, he began to miss the freedom of laying aside his mask. He wondered if he was too soft in awarding points back that he took away. But he finally decided that even though it was soft of him, he didn't mind. He missed Lily and the friendship that they had shared. Could he ever have a friendship like that again? Could he have that with Harry? It would be a relief to have more than just Albus that he can lay aside his mask for. It's true that Harry once tormented him for no other reason than looking like his father, but slowly his feelings and perceptions changed. He struggled as he became aware of his desires and longed for the day that Harry would leave Hogwarts so that he could try to forget about him. But did he really want to say goodbye if friendship were possible? And what if Harry was right? What if someone, somewhere, could love him, if only he was open to the possibility and enabled the opportunity for their paths to cross? Perhaps his desires for Harry would dissipate and his feelings will turn instead to one who could return them. As he climbed into bed he smiled. His heart was filled with happiness and hope.

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Please review! Any lines or moments from this story or chapter that was a particular favorite?

I am planning on one more chapter to serve as a bridge between this story and the sequel. I am planning on ch.7 consisting of short scenes that take place during the remainder of the school year, whereas the sequel will take place during the summer. What do you hope to see for ch.7 (and/or the sequel)? Harry coming out to his friends? Focus primarily on interactions between HP & SS or include interactions with others? (If so, whom?) Inclusion of career plans for HP? Both HP and SS Pov's, or just one or the other?


	7. Chapter 7

**Astronomy** **Tower**

**Thank** **you** to all my lovely reviewers and loyal readers! I am overwhelmed by the support (readership, reviews, favorites, and alerts). Wow! : )

**Warnings:** Pre-Snarry (attractions felt, not yet revealed)

**Disclaimer:** I do not own the characters nor anything else you recognize. I'm just borrowing the characters for a bit of fun. :D

**Previously** **in** **"Astronomy** **Tower":** **Quick** **Summary** **of** **Chapter** **1-6**

Severus catches Harry in the Astronomy Tower. Harry is upset, Severus shows concern, and Harry confides in Severus. Harry reveals that he is gay, is worried that his friends wouldn't support him, and is upset because he feels that the man he is interested in is someone that he shouldn't be interested in. Severus gives comfort, assurance, and advice. In the process, he also shares personal information about himself, including the fact that he has given up on love. They make a promise to each other: Harry will take Severus' advice on how to pursue the man of his interest if Severus will give love a chance. As it turns out, they both have feelings for the other, but have not let it be known to anyone else.

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**Chapter** **Seven:** **Epilogue**

Later in the school year, in the Potions classroom…

Harry was nearly done with his Sight Enhancement potion, with just one last ingredient to add. Professor Snape had just walked by, peered into the cauldron, glared at the Serpentfly wings that Harry was crushing into a powder with his mortar and pestle, and continued on with only a grunt of acknowledgement. Harry smiled to himself. _If_ _there_ _were_ _anything_ _wrong_ _with_ _my_ _potion_, _Snape_ _wouldn't_ _hesitate_ _to_ _say_ _something_, _so_ _I_ _must_ _have_ _done_ _well!_

A few minutes later Professor Snape stood at the front of the room and loudly announced, "Time is up. Turn in a vial, no matter how unfinished or atrocious it is, and you may leave."

Harry chose that moment to dump in all of his Serpentfly wings and then he quickly backed away from his cauldron.

_BOOM!_

"Potter!" Professor Snape yelled. "Stay after class!"

Harry forced a look of irritation on his face as he attempted to pour some of the ruined potion into a vial and began to gather his textbooks.

"We'll see you in the common room, Harry," Hermione promised, as she walked by with a sympathetic look.

Ron was not far behind her. "Don't let that git rile you up too much, mate. We can't afford to lose many points."

Harry nodded to them both and finished gathering his things. When all his classmates had left he made his way up to the front, where Snape sat at his desk, organizing the vials that had been placed there.

"Write a foot-long essay on how the amount of Serpentfly wings, the degree to which they are crushed, and the speed with which they are added affects the quality of this potion," Snape said without looking up.

"But I had a perfectly good potion until the last ingredient and I ruined it on purpose!"

"Should I make that two feet?" Dark eyes glared at him dangerously.

Harry sighed. "No, sir. You're right. It was foolish to cause the explosion and I deserve to write the essay."

Snape nodded curtly and turned his attentions back to the vials. "I'll expect the essay before your next Potions class."

Harry didn't move. He stared at Severus' beautiful hands as he examined the vials, turning them this way and that, and jotted down his observations on parchment. He momentarily forgot why he was there.

"You said you ruined it on purpose. Explain," the rich voice suddenly uttered softly.

Harry blinked and tore his eyes from Severus' hands, looking up instead at the professor's face, which held no expression. "I… uh… needed to talk to you."

"I'm available before and after class, as well as during office hours. That does not require a ruined potion."

"Um… yeah, but my friends would think it odd if I sought you out voluntarily."

Snape hummed and looked back at the vials. "What did you need to talk to me about?" he asked in an guarded-sounded tone.

"I just wanted to tell you that I talked to my friends and everything's fine, just like you told me it would be."

"How fortunate for you." His tone seemed almost light and friendly.

"Yeah. I was relieved." Harry shuffled his feet. "So… I was wondering. I know that our textbook says that this potion only gives better eyesight for a few hours, but I was wondering if there's a potion that permanently fixes bad eyes."

"No." Snape continued to take notes.

"Why not?"

"Because a successful potion has not yet been invented."

"Oh…" Harry replied, feeling disappointed.

Snape looked up. His eyes seemed to soften. "There's no potion for a permanent cure, but that doesn't mean you don't have options. Vision-correction is something that some Medi-wizards and -witches, as well as muggle doctors, specialize in. Quite honestly, I know very little about it. I don't know what they are capable of, how successful their methods are, or how expensive they are."

Harry smiled. "Okay, thanks. I'll look into it."

Snape nodded and went back to his vials and notes. "Don't you have somewhere to be?"

Harry's heart began to quicken. "Uh… well… there was just one more thing…" He hesitated.

Snape looked up after several uncomfortable moments, impatience clearly marked on his face. "Potter, I don't have all day."

Harry swallowed uncomfortably but plunged ahead. There was no way but forward. "I, uh, wanted your help this summer. If that's okay. I had Dobby and Kreacher look over Grimmauld Place recently - that's where I'll be living when school's out. There are some pests that I'll need to get rid of and, um, I'd much rather brew my own potion rather than purchase one - although I could use a bit of help on that. But I was mainly concerned with the curses and dark artifacts. Most are quite old and very dark and… I was hoping you could help me… uh, you know, get rid of them…" He had gotten most of that out in a rush and then at the end trailed off, feeling self-conscious as Snape stared at him without expression.

"I'll pay you. Generously," he added. He held his breath and braced himself for rejection.

"I don't need your money, Potter."

"I…" His mind grasped for something Snape couldn't resist. And then he had it. "I'll give you free-rein of the library. You can borrow, or keep, any of the books you desire."

Finally there was a flicker in the dark eyes, the slightest rise of an eyebrow, and an almost imperceptible twitch of a lip. "I'll consider it. Ask me again when the school year is over."

Harry grinned. "Brilliant! Okay, well, I should be going now. Thank you, Professor."

Snape inclined his head in response.

Feeling like he could fly without a broom, Harry made his way out of the classroom. Just as he reached the door, he turned his head. Snape was looking at him. Harry smiled. He wasn't sure, but it almost looked like Snape gave a small smile in return.

Harry couldn't wait for summer. Somehow he would find a way into that man's heart…

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**Please** **review! Thank** **you!**

**Thank** **you** **for** **being** **patient** **for** **this** **final** **chapter**!

**Sequel** **News:**

I've written a bit on the 2nd installment of the series ("Way To A Man's Heart") but it will be quite awhile before I continue work on it since I want to focus on finishing up my WIP's. I'm excited about this story because it will be a bit different than my other stories. Harry will be pursuing Sev as a friend and finding ways to encourage Sev to see him as a possible love interest. Sev will be helping Harry clean up Grimmauld Place, and in addition to free-rein of the library, Harry will be cooking for Sev. SO… I will be including recipes of what Harry makes for Sev! How's that for something different!

For those anxious for Snarry action, keep in mind that my version of SS in this story has a painful backstory (date rape – SS will reveal more details to HP in the sequels. Poor Sev!) and low self-esteem, so it's _necessary_ for their relationship to happen slowly. I hope that the sequels will make the wait worth it! In the 3rd story in the series, HP will give SS some much needed "sexual healing" ;)


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